By Cordell Winrow
Who do you want to be for me today that you haven’t been able to be for me at any other point?
While this might seem out there for many, this was probably one of my favorite prayers to pray over the years. At first glance it might look to be a one dimensional prayer, but if you will take time to sit with it, a different reality will begin to make itself known. This is the first of the leading type prayers that we will go over. What is a leading prayer you might ask? A leading prayer is a type of prayer that when answered will lead you into different directions to continue praying and encountering the Holy Spirit. If we consider the action of prayer as a vehicle, this particular prayer is like firing up the GPS so as to get directions to your destination. While getting the address to input into the GPS is valuable in its own right, that isn’t where the journey ends. We still have to execute the directions given by the GPS so that we actually get to our destination. (I need to stress the importance of understanding that we need to acknowledge when this particular prayer is answered. It is easy to overlook the answer, and as a result we miss out on the validation that comes from acknowledging the faithfulness of Jesus to respond.)
Once this prayer is answered, it must always be followed up with different questions that respond to the answer given. Let’s say that Jesus responds and says, “I want to be your healer.” That is an amazing answer, but if that is where things get left, we will have missed out on the crux of relational development. See, His reply to our prayer, was an invitation to deeper dialogue and revelation of His heart for us. Diving a bit deeper on the healer portion. If Jesus says to you that he wants to be your healer, what image does that bring to mind? Is that the only thing that it brings to mind? Or are there potentially other facets that can be seen? The reality of the matter is that His statement can be taken so many ways, which is why it ought to lead you to ask deeper questions in response to the answer given. I mean, what if he wanted to be your financial healer, or emotional healer, or the healer of childhood trauma, or the healer of spiritual abuse? Those may not be things you would have thought about, however, they may have been things that were on His heart for you.
It is probably easy to see at this point how a prayer like this is meant to lead you into direct conversation with the Lord. For this reason, I have seen this prayer answered quite consistently. We vastly underestimate the Lord’s interest in intimate communication with us. Leading questions are just the spark needed to fuel the fires of relationship that lead into spaces of revelation. Unfortunately, so many of us have pigeon holed the Lord in how is able to function, without realizing it. While we hold on to the theology that belief that God is bigger than we could imagine, and able to do exceedingly above all we could ask or think, we subtly find ourselves in precarious positions when it comes to our expectations of how he will be coming through for us. Healing for most is a one dimensional affair, as is provision, shelter, and strength. So many unconsciously have an image in their hearts and minds that tend to determine their perspective of how Jesus is rather than investing in communicating with Him so that He can actually display His heart.
Leading prayers have been an amazing find in my life, genuinely transforming the landscape of my heart. It is hard to imagine life without them now, as they have fueled my relationship with the Lord for so long. The process of learning how to acknowledge when he responds was one of the toughest things for me. All too often I would downplay what was being said, and then miss out on opportunities to pursue even richer dialogue. Over the years, my default response has become, “Jesus, what do you mean by…?” When I have prayed this prayer, there have been times where he has consistently given me the same response. After a while, I got the hint that He was saying something that I was not aware of, and that I would need to “dig” a bit deeper. The first time I asked Him what he meant, I heard this low chuckle. He ended up saying, “Finally…I am glad you asked.” My life has not been the same since.
Moving beyond the first answer, into conversation, I was shown that it wasn’t enough just to ask the questions. He was intent on moving into what he was speaking to me about. When Jesus said He wanted to be my healer, I didn’t know what I was in for. See physically I have scoliosis, a curvature of the spine. At one point in my life, doctors thought I was going to need to have spinal surgery. Thank God, that never was the case. So in my one track way of thinking I was certain He meant physically. However, I was sorely mistaken. He meant emotionally, specifically dealing with a rather large father wound that I had incurred in my early years of life. First off, I wasn’t ready for Him to say that. Secondly, I had no grid for what was about to happen. Suffice to say, I went through 2-3 years of intense heart surgery as he began to uproot several lies, and toxic memories that were distorting my view of the Father. There were more yelling matches, times in which I brazenly cussed the Lord out because of the sheer amount of pain and stress that had been lying dormant. Once they were dug up, it was a flood of emotions that I had no understanding on how to deal with. However, we walked through it, we got through it, and I am learning to love my family in a way that I had never received. This has become my reality because Jesus spoke that he wanted to be my healer. My response was all that was needed as he led me hand in hand to deal with those issues.
There are times in our lives in which we see the Lord operate in certain ways. That might look like a provider, healer, teacher, coach, or even an encourager. Of course He is not limited in how He will come, however the main thing to note is that these appearances are not one off encounters. Over the years, I have made the statement, “I thought we already dealt with that”, more times than I can remember. The amount of times the Lord has been my healer, provider, and strength, is mind boggling. What is even more intense is the fact that there is probably only a degree of separation between the ways in which He has shown up. I am not sure how many different times He has come and walked me through an area of people pleasing. Yet, each time He came it was different than the time before. We need not become complacent when it comes to how Jesus decides He wants to show up for us. He understands the timing of things, and knows just when to appear in our lives in the absolute best way possible for that particular moment.
It makes sense not to be perplexed by His decisions making, but it never fails to surprise me. As unpredictable He is, there is always wisdom in His decision making. If He wants to show up as your comforter, it would be prudent to begin to ask what it is in you that needs to be comforted. More often than not, I have found that He tends to address things that have fallen by the wayside, but ultimately impact one of the next legs of our journey. Even though to us it might seem off kilter, it will make divine sense if given enough time to play out. As such, my suggestion in all of this, is to use a lead in prayer such as this as an invitation to invest in your relationship with the Lord. Receiving an answer will prompt so many possibilities when it comes to growing deeper in relationship with Jesus. Not only that, we will begin to see His heart more clearly than we have ever considered.