Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Brother, let me take out the speck that is in your eye,’ when you yourself do not see the log that is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take out the speck that is in your brother’s eye. Luke 6:41-42
How is it that we can see everyone else’s problems but not our own? It is the human condition that will hide from the nagging conscience God has given to us — where we have things we need to correct, repent, and confess before the Lord. We love to tell our married spouses how they need to change, and do things the ‘right’ way, all the while not dealing with the issues the Lord wants to change in our own lives. “What do you mean by that — the Lord hasn’t given me anything I need to change?” Really? Are you asking Him? Honestly? Sincerely? Or would you rather just hide? And everyone else around us has to deal with the plank in our eye which we claim doesn’t exist. We like to judge others on their behavior and shortcomings — but not deal with the very issue the Lord has been trying to get us to see in our character for … years.
We like to point out other people’s responsibilities and shortcomings without dealing with our deep seated core issues of pride, fear, and lust within our own selves. This is most magnified within the very closest of relationships — usually within marriages. Why? These relationships are most safe yet the most intimate. Other relationships seem safer because they don’t prick those issues we need to change within ourselves. But in actuality marriages suffer because one or both parties don’t seek the Lord for all the changes He wants to do in them. They can’t hear His Voice or seek His Voice in these relational areas. And then frustration sets in. Disappointment is easily accepted and the spiral begins — and usually manifests with one or both attempting to control the other. Excuses also become a game of tit-for-tat. In a heated argument the self protection walls go up — and the ‘word weapons’ begin to be thrown. After an argument with your spouse do any of you go to the Lord and seek His council? Are you brave enough to ask Him what you did wrong? Do you actually want to know? Or do want to have the plank remain in your own eye — and make everyone else have to just deal with it?
Many like to remain spiritually blind and ignorant – that way they don’t have to confront all the things that they need to change in their lives. They don’t have to confess and they can believe they truly know the right way to do things and everyone else needs to follow their example. Ahem… that’s pride.
The greatest thing in any relationship you can do to make them stronger and more vital, better, and more significant is … to have daily, hourly conversations with the Lord on what He wants you to do… especially in regards to your relationships. What areas does He want to change in you? How does He want you to grow? What fruit of the Spirit do you need more of .. in regards to your closest relationships? Specifically — in you at this moment?
Do you want to see spiritually? Do you want to see the spiritual realm? Deal with what the Lord wants to change in you … today. What does He want you working on within yourself? Pray the dangerous prayers before Him asking Him to show you. Ask Jesus to truly open your eyes to see the … truth of things .. in you.
This is where spiritual truth MUST begin. In us.